Saturday, March 23, 2013

Eyes Wide Open

I've been hearing a lot about this blog lately. Not because of what I what I have been writing, but rather because I haven’t been writing. Apparently, inquiring minds want to know! 

It all started when God dropped Isaiah 1 in our laps. Literally- you might remember that from this post. This chapter strikes such a chord with me that I am certain God Himself engraved it on my very soul. We were already on a journey that we knew would include adoption, but there was a bigger lesson He still had to teach me. 

It goes something like this: sometimes my kids fight (shocking, I know). Sometimes the younger ones lash out in anger and push or snatch toys, or wrestling gets out of hand and one gets hurt. When I correct the offender I always say something like “Aiden is mine. And you hurt him. I won’t tolerate you hurting my Aiden”. It is a nifty little piece of parenting advice I got from someone older and wiser and it works like a charm every time! They know that even though they might not have cared in that moment of anger whether or not the other kid got hurt, they do care that I am upset with them. Pick a fight with one of my kids and I will be the one to defend them. Even if you are one of my kids, too. I will correct you in love, but I will correct you.

Enter Isaiah 1.

At first I didn't like the chapter. I didn't like the accusation or the conviction it brought with all it's seriousness and “you have blood on your hands” stuff. I really didn't like the idea that God that didn't want to hear my rambling prayers for comfort, health, and happiness while I closed my eyes to the things He cared about. (Wait. This isn't all about me, you say?)

The past year God has been at work increasing my fear of the Lord, and as He did, it increased my security in Him. Yep, you read that right, because don’t forget: I’m one of His kids, too. He defends me as much as He does anyone. Seek to hurt or harm me and listen for His whisper of warning: “Bridget is mine”.  This means I’m free to stop worrying about my own concerns and worry about someone else’s.

It’s the most beautiful thing. See, the plan laid out in Isaiah 1 benefits us both- the helper and the one helped. I wash my hands, ie: get a clean conscience and free myself up for blessings and more of the Lord, and the one I help receives mercy, love, or even justice. I call like to call that "winning".  

I don’t want to close my eyes to the problems of others- even if I can't fix them. If I close my eyes too long I fall asleep. Ask my husband. History channel documentaries are like my Benadryl. I can only imagine it works the same way with my soul. Close my eyes, choose indifference over compassion too many times, and my soul might fall asleep. I’m not saying I could lose my salvation here – but when I finally get to heaven I want more than a “get out of hell free” card to flash before Jesus. Know what I mean? I’d like some crowns to lay at his feet.

I’d like to say “I loved with everything I had” and more importantly, for Him to reply “I know.”

So, I’m going to share with you the roads God has taken us down. Yes, one of those roads is adoption. I have been a very busy girl while I haven’t been blogging. I’ve been filling out lots of paperwork, running around for appointments, and most recently stalking the mailman. (Don’t worry Mr. Mailman, I know I watch you with the same creepy, intense gaze of a lion about to pounce on prey, but I promise I’m no threat to you. I’m just hanging out, waiting on a miracle. No big.) I’ll share the details of our progress in my next post and it will be short and to the point long and with lots of “feeling words” and references to the good Book. 

Yet, the Lord has been up to much more than just the adoption and I'd like to share that, too. There has been a definite awakening of sorts around here. And I hope you will see and experience the freedom it is bringing for yourself. “Love God, love others” has been a lingering theme we have been exploring, and it’s turned our world upside down. I like to think this is just the beginning. 

There is an abundant life to be had, folks, and it’s ours for the taking. You coming or what?

If He comes suddenly, do not let him find you sleeping.” – Mark 13:36

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